Zim and Gaz's Waffles of DOOM and stuff
by thehotmageaeris
Summary: Title is CRAP! So ignore it. This ficcy is a ZAGR, and I am sooooooooooo not awake. There might be some DATR later on. Please read and review or leave tuna.
1. The last of the Franken Chokies

PUMA!

It was a clear early Monday morning, the birds were tweeting happily as the sun rose to caress the world with its loving rays. Gaz Membrane awoke to the sounds of the cheerful birds that told her to say hello to another day. She rubbed her eyes and hopped out of bed sleepily and headed straight for her dresser. Opening it, she grabbed a brick and chucked it out her open window. Hearing the squawk of the once noisy bird, she hopped back into bed with satisfaction and cuddled back into the warmth of her blankets.

Just as she was falling back into the dreams of her strange mind, her Bloaty the Pig alarm clock went off, indicating it was time to get ready for another day at skool. With a growl, she grabbed it and chucked it out the window as well, hearing another squawk. Again, she attempted to fall back into her dream world.

"Gaz! Time to get up sweetie! You have quite an important day ahead of you!" Her father, Professor Membrane, appeared upon one of her flickering monitors in her room. She sat up to glare at her obnoxious father figure.

"But it's just another stupid day in this stupid world at stupid school with stupid Dib." Gaz retorted coldly. Her father gave a hearty chuckle her while appearing to be measuring some chemicals in tubes.

"Now, now, sweetheart, school is important for you, like SCIENCE! Now hurry up and get ready. Have fun at skool sweetheart." He told her, adding some ingredients from one tube into the other, resulting in an explosion. The image went fuzzy but she could still hear the sounds of something frothing and her dad yelling about the chemicals being unbalanced. "Got to go, honey!" And with that, the fuzzy images switched off.

She stared at it for a few seconds through her squinted eyes before hopping out of bed in her pajamas with wings upon the back of them. When she was finished dressing in her usual Goth-like attire and her purple hair was brushed into place, she went into the kitchen and headed straight for the Franken Chokies. However, when she picked up the box, she opened her eyes in anger, sending her glare at her older brother who sat at the table. Eating her cereal.

"DIB!" Gaz roared, going straight up to her brother who had jumped at his own name. "You ATE the LAST of the FRANKEN CHOKIES!"

"Oh, heheh, sorry about that Gaz. You see, I wasn't really thinking about it while I was coming up with this great plan on how to stop Zim with his next EVIL plan! Oh, it's going to be awesome! You see, I used these parts from—" Dib began to explain before Gaz cut him off.

"You don't think at all. And mark my words, Dib, when we get home from school, I'm going to make you wish I was never BORN! You're going to suffer, Dib, oh how you will suffer..." And with that, she made toast and ate it quietly at the table, next to her fear-shaken sibling. Gaz expertly flipped open her Game Slave 2 heading out of the house to begin the walk to the bus stop a few blocks off. Dib came running out the door to catch up with her, spotting his nemesis across the street heading the same direction.

"It's amazing you can run at all with that huge head of yours." Gaz said, without even looking up once from her Vampire Piggy Hunter game.

"Look! It's Zim! I just know he's plotting something evil with his—Hey! My head isn't big!" Dib cried, grasping his head. Gaz snorted and cleared another level in her game. Dib went back to focusing on his enemy, who hadn't noticed him yet. "ZIM!"

"What?" The green human-disguised alien looked around him, not seeing them across the street.

"ZIM!"

"What!"

"ZIM!"

"WHAT! Oh, it's just you, Dib monkey. What do you want, you FILTHY stink human?" Zim snarled, finally spotting Dib. Dib and Gaz had to cross the street to arrive at the bus stop, ending up next to Zim. Gaz still had not looked up from her game. Zim and Dib just stood there, glaring at each. The beeps from Gaz's GS2 were the only sounds anyone heard for several seconds.

"I'm on to you Zim! I'll stop you today, after school, once and for all! Soon, you'll be on a sterile dissecting table with all your alien guts strewn about you and scientist finding out everything about you and—" Dib spat at Zim until he was cut off by Gaz again.

"Your voice in stupid." Gaz coldly said. Her next comment dripped with venom that made even Zim shiver. "Remember... When we get home from school, you will pay for eating the last of the Franken Chokies. I will DESTROY you."

"I concur with your scary worm baby sibling. YOU AND YOUR BIG HEAD WILL MEET YOUR DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!" Zim howled, pointing at Dib's eyeball.

"My head is NOT big! Gaz! Don't you think you might be over reacting about the cereal? I said I was sorry! How about I buy you another box, all for yourself?" Dib pleaded. Gaz finally looked up from her game, giving her brother a look that made him jump back.

"No, Dib, this is the fourth time you've eaten up something that belongs to me. ME, DIB, ME! I will not let this go until I have my vengeance!" Gaz snarled.

Zim glanced at her through his lilac contacts, raising a green eyebrow as she went on a long rant of what she would do to Dib. Zim found her aura quite intriguing, wondering how such a small human can instigate so much fear. The alien rubbed his chin in thought. She was definitely different than any other human he had ever met. The bus finally showed up, though the two human siblings didn't seem to notice.

"Uh, your smelly human bus thing is here." Zim said quietly yet loud enough to interrupt their feud. Gaz turned back from her brother, who was in the fetal position shaking on the ground. The bus door open and Zim took a step back to allow Gaz to get on first, not out of courtesy, but out of fear of her wrath. She looked up at Zim, pondering his actions, before finally stepping on the bus.

Zim followed after her while Dib picked himself off the ground. The kids on the bus, as well as the bus driver were all staring right at him. He noticed that he had dropped his weapon he had been working on to finally stop Zim. He quickly scooped it up and put it in his baggy before hopping on the bus. Sitting in the front like he always did, he stoically received his daily torment as the other kids tossed paper and junk at his big head. Gaz sat several seats behind him and Zim sat right across the aisle from her. They continued their trek to the dreaded skool.

Author Notes: DOdodododODOdoDooDOODODodooODODoooOOOOooo! DOOM! Hehehe, k, no, whatever! So this is my first attempt at a ZAGR as well as just an Invader Zim fic in general. I looooooooove muffins. And pie. So please, PLEASE, review. Cus I'm makin' WAFFLES!

Next chaptery-thingy will have Zim and Gaz and Dib and maybe Gir at school! Or after school! It involves a bathroom! And a ray gun or something! And stuff! I NEEEEEEEEED FIVE REVIEWS PLEASE! Like Gaz needsher GS2.


	2. The horrible, horrible bathroom of doom

Chapter 2 for Zim and Gaz's Waffles of DOOOOOOOM!

Gaz casually shuffled into her homeroom, plopping down into her desk with her Game Slave 2 in hand. Another level cleared. Saving. And shut off. Gaz tenderly placed her Game Slave 2 in her backpack and turned her focus to the teacher. Mr. Elliot, a very happy looking man with the gayest looking sweater she had ever seen, smiled at the faces of his students.

"Hey there kids! GOOD MORNING! Today we're going to learn about what makes the world go round……… LOVE!" Mr. Elliot beamed as if he just downed a whole bottle of Zoloft. He went over to the blackboard and drew a giant heart on it. Gaz pried her eyes open with annoyance.

"You have GOT to be kidding me." She gave out a loud snort and pulled out her Game Slave 2 and turned it on, ignoring the stupidity of her teacher who ranted on about hugging strangers and bunnies and such. About an hour into his speech, he stopped talking.

Gaz was too busy slaying the Vampire piggy lord boss to notice that everyone was staring at her, she was in the zone. Her teacher cleared her throat, prompting her to look up after she paused the game. She gave a low quiet growl for being interrupted from her game. The growl and glare she gave to the teacher disturbed her classmates. Her teacher turned his frown upside down into a warm smile as he walked over to her desk.

"Now Gaz, this is the fourth time you have excluded yourself from class activities. I told you the last time that I was going to confiscate your game if we had this happen again. Your games are not part of class, you can come to get it after school." Mr. Elliot told her. He held out his hand, waiting for the Game Slave to fill it.

"Your class activities are stupid. I've just got to beat this boss and then I can save— HEY!" Gaz's eyes shot wide open with anger as her teacher took her game and shut it off.

Everyone in the room gasped. Gaz's face went crimson red while shaking in pure rage. She began to scratch deep marks into the table with her nailsas her teacher backed away with a nervous smile and went back to his talk on love. Gaz pulled out her sketch book and began to furiously draw hideous creatures resembling demons and pigs put together feasting upon her teacher's bloody organs, all the while muttering about how he was going to pay.

During recess about two hours later………. Meow.

Zim and Dib stood glaring at one another as they waited in line to play on the swings. Two of them finally opened up, both were next to each other. Dib and Zim jumped into them without breaking their glare. Dib chuckled evilly. Zim only raised an eyebrow at him

"Soon, I will expose you for the alien you are, Zim! Everyone will see! They will thank me wh

"I'll show you that I am normal! Behold! I shall swing upon this normal earthly……… swingy contraption, thingy!" Zim declared, flailing his legs, mimicking the other children's actions upon the swing. However, he did not get very high. Dib jumped up to stand on the swing, swinging it sideways to collide into Zim's swing, sending him falling into the dirt.

"Oh, you FILTHY WORM BABY! You will see the spicy goodness of my taco vengeance!" Zim screamed at him, jumping up to stand on the swing as well. They swung the swings sideways, colliding into each other repeatedly. Both yelled at each other in fury, determined to knock the other off first.

Gaz watched the two moronically try to injure one another before scuffling off towards her class. She had about ten minutes to go in and put her plan in motion. She walked through the halls of the decrepit and disgusting prison called skool. She reached her class and went into its darkness. Soon she would have her one and only beloved back in her possession……….. Quickly, she searched, feeling that she was nearing her beautiful Game Slave 2. He hands finally found the object of her desire and an evil grin spread upon her face. However, once again, a pair of hands grasped her precious, trying hard to shake it from her grasp.

"Gaz! How did you get in here?" Mr. Elliot demanded, pocketing her Game Slave 2 in his gay sweater. She cringed at the thought of her beautiful game being tarnished by that flamboyant garment. "You're not going to get this until AFTER school."

Gaz's eyes narrowed dangerously, causing Mr. Elliot to step back in fear. Storm clouds formed outside and rain poured down in thick sheets. Thunder and the sound of Zim screaming from the burning rain could be heard outside. The lights began to flicker badly. Rodents, frogs and insects crawled out of the crevices in the walls, covering the room's walls and making them move. Mr. Elliot's eyes shot back and forth in fear as Gaz began to glow with an evil aura. She started shaking again and clenched her fists, her lips parting to say venomous words that made her teacher gasp in shock.

"Your sweater's GAY."

"G-Gaz!" Her teacher faltered, moving to the desk. He opened the desk and grabbed a slip from inside. He shook, hating to say what was inevitably next. "I hate to do this, but you've left me with no choice! I'm assigning you to after school detention!"

"Pshh! Like I care." Gaz retorted. He handed her the slip and watched her leave. As soon as she left, she put the paper in her mouth and swallowed it. Back in the classroom, the bugs and rodents disappeared and the sky went back to being sunny. Mr. Elliot sighed, slumping into his chair.

After school got out and the silly children of Earth ran out of the skool grounds as if it were a prison break………….

Torque walked through the hall, towards the large head that called to him like a beacon. His greasy hands reached, grabbing his target firmly. With a swift tug, he wrapped it to the large head. Torque guffawed and exited the skool, leaving a pain-stricken Dib with the wedgy of DOOOOM! He pulled his undies off his head and tried to fix his pants as Zim walked by with burn marks all over him. The alien stopped and looked at his human enemy.

"Silly Dib-monkey! No one likes you with your humungous head! Mwahahahah! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA—Okay." Zim laughed at him before turning to walk away.

"Now is the time to get Zim! Now I just have to get my weapon and I'll have him trapped! Then EVERYONE will believe me about aliens!" Dib grinned wickedly as he went through his bag, finding his weapon.

"You know, I can still hear you." Zim told him, still standing where he was. He was now slurping on an Irken soda.

"Oh." Dib said. "WHY DO I KEEP TALKING OUT LOUD?"

"Hey, where's your scary beast sibling, I was really looking forward to watching her destroy you for me." Zim changed the subject with an evil grin. Dib looked about him.

"Hmm, I don't know. She never waits when she wants to doom me………" Dib muttered aloud, more to himself than Zim. He turned back towards Zim, holding his new weapon pointed at his head. "It doesn't matter, I'm going to stop you once and for all!"

Zim was too busy slurping up the last of his alien soda. He finished it and crunched the can looking pleased, finally noticed Dib again. "Mmmm, yeah, oh, er, what?"

"I'm going to stop—"

"What?"

"I'm going to stop—"

"What?"

"ARGH! I'M GOING TO STOP YOU! NOW!" Dib screamed at him.

"You haven't the brain meats to stop me, stink human." Zim told him. Dib fired at him, missing by an inch. There was nothing but a hole left where he shot. Zim screamed and ran away. "CURSE YOU DIB-HUMAN! CURSE YOU!"

Meanwhile……… Hehehe, I'm floating!

Gaz had daringly escaped from the torturous cells of detention and was now walking down the empty halls playing her Game Slave 2 that she had this time successfully got back. How, you ask? Well if I were to tell you, YOUR HEAD WOULD IMPLODE THEN EXPLODE! Anyways, she felt the sudden urge to use the toilet and pushed open the heavy doors to the girl's bathroom. Taking care of business, she went to wash her hands. A clanking sound could be heard from the other side of the door. Gaz wiped her hands off with a paper towel and went to exit through the heavy door. Her eyes widened in shock.

On the other side of the door………

The janitor pocketed his keys and went on locking down the rest of the skool, whistling a merry tune the entire time. He could not hear the enraged screeching and pounding from behind the door. The door was that thick.

Zim ran around the corner, thinking he had lost Dib in the labyrinth of halls in the skool. However, to his horror, a shot buzzed past him. He screamed and ran, looking for a place to hide. He spotted a door, leading to the forbidden place that no human boy would ever trudge. He pushed it open and ran in, thinking no one would be inside due to it being after school and all. He listened to the sound of Dib running past his hiding place until he was long gone. Zim's hand shot up into the air proudly.

"VICTORY FOR ZIM!" He shouted and then fixed his black wig.

"You IDIOT!" A voice screamed from behind him. He turned around to find himself face to face with Dib's scary sister. Her eye was twitching and she ground her teeth together. "Now we're locked in here and I'm stuck with YOU!"

Zim stared at her for several seconds before turning to look at the large solid metal door. He pushed on it. It didn't budge. He pushed on it again. Still no budging. He threw himself at the door repeatedly for a minute, yet the door remained where it was. He picked himself up and looked from the door to Gaz.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" Zim screamed, pounding his fists on the door. Gaz glared at him before pulling out her Game Slave 2.

Ten minutes later………

"HEY! HEY! HEEEEEEEY! HELLO? HEEEEEEEEELLO? HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY! HEEEEEEEY! ANYONE? HELLO? HEY! HEY! OPEN UP! HEY! HEEEEEEEEEY! HEY HEY HEY HEY! HELLO! HEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOO! HEY HEY HE—" Zim screamed at the door, praying someone would hear them, until Gaz cut him off.

"I just got back to where I was before my stupid teacher turned off my game and I'm fighting the Vampire piggy lord boss. If you make one sound I will bring horrible suffering down upon you and your alien eyes." Gaz warned him, peering out of one of her eyes at his horrible excuse for a disguise. She went back to jabbing the buttons on her game.

"You dare tell me, Zim, what to do? It's bad enough I have to be stuck with that Dib monkey's worm baby sibling—" Zim began. Gaz shot him the death glare.

"Horrible……… Suffering……." Gaz growled, shaking a fist in warning.

She went back to her game once more and Zim remained silent, staring at her as she went back into her zone. How strange she was indeed. Always nonchalant, unless angered, and so focused. He realized that she would make an excellent Irken invader. However, she would probably be too caught up with her games to do much 'invading'. Zim's eyes kept itching from the contacts he kept in them. Growling, he rubbed them fiercely.

"Why not just take it off? It's a stupid disguise anyways." Gaz said, her eyes glued to the small screen in her hands.

Zim was surprised that she talked, even more so when she directed her talkingness towards him. He frowned in anger.

"I am ZIIIIIIIIIIM! I don't need a human stink beast to tell me when I should take off my disguise!" Zim declared. He rubbed his eyes a little more as they began to twitch with itchiness.

Gaz had finished the level, slaying the Vampire piggy lord boss once and for all, and saved. She took the opportunity to look up at him as it saved and loaded the next level. Her eye twitched as well, but with annoyance.

"And I am Gaz, who will be the conductor of your demise if you don't shut up and take the stupid crap off." Gaz said to him. He promptly took out his violet contacts, revealing ruby red eyes, and his silly looking wig where his antennas hid under, wrapped around his head.

Gaz looked at him, studying his alien face, and he stared back. Satisfied, she went back down at the new level. Zim placed his disguise in his Irken pack on his back. He knew now that it was going to be a long night being trapped in this skool bathroom.

Author notes: bllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!11 oh dear gawd I'm tired. (Sleeps)Thanks for all the reviews! They were awesome and made me feel like I'm special! (Throws candy, piggies and a cake out into audience) It was like four in the morning when I wrote this so I'm sorry if it suxxors. I WILL DO BETTER! (Beats head with fish) Review some more PLEAAAAAAASEEEEEEEEE! Thank you!


End file.
